Random Thoughts
by Drarry2426
Summary: Classes can be a drag. See what goes on in bored students' vacant heads.


**Ron :** hmm, Harry looked unnaturally chipper this morning.  
**Draco :** my legs are _cramped_. And my bum itch ... wonder if anyone would notice me scratching? (glances around. Scratches buttocks)  
**Ron :** ugh, foul rat face is scratching his arse. Argh, why am I watching him scratch his arse?!  
**Harry :** hee hee. Draco has such a pert arse. Can't wait to waylay him after class ...  
**Crabbe :** yawn ... damn sleepy. I wanna some Cockroach Clusters.  
**Harry :** ... maybe I can ambush him for a quickie under the stairs. (grins)  
**Ron :** why is Harry smirking and staring at Malfoy?  
**Harry :** (licks lips and grinned wider)  
**Draco :** I can _see_ you leering at me, Harry! Insatiable maniac. Ow, my arse's still sore. Bad idea to let him sleep inside me.  
**Ron :** oh ... oh! Malfoy is smiling at Harry!  
**Hermi :** I knew it! I knew it!  
**Ron : ****_?! &$&*$#%_**  
**Seamus :** cor, Professor Sinistra's boobies are _huge!_  
**Dean :** hey, where's my candy?  
**Crabbe :** (snigger)  
**Draco :** (licks lips. Blows air kiss towards Harry) Rowr.  
**Harry :** (winks) ... wait till I get my hands on you...  
**Draco :** Rowr.  
**Seamus :** oh boy! She's bending. She's _bending!_  
**Crabbe :** gah, Malfoy's flirting again. Wanton bugger.  
**Harry :** down boy, down! (hands in pockets)  
**Crabbe :** idiot forgot to use the Silencing Charm again. That's the bloody fourth night in a row!  
**Ron :** why is Harry pounding his thighs?  
**Hermi :** argh, period pain! Wails.  
**Draco :** (positively randy) come and get it lover.  
**Harry :** damn damn damn! Not a good time for a hard-on. Not in class!  
**Hermi :** must owl Justin ... no sex for a bit.  
**Goyle :** Malfoy's at it again. Randy bastard. Bloody twit kept me up all night with his moaning.

**Prof Sinistra :** somebody's hitting on me, hee hee.  
**Goyle :** I'll _Incendio_ his bed's hangings the next time. Ha ha!  
**Blaise :** pink lipstick or peach lipstick? I feel soooo girly this week. My inner goddess Aphrodite must be coming through.  
**Terry Boot :** wonder if Blaise's a boy or girl this week...hmmm, perhaps he's game for a shag. Ravenclaws are such _boring_ lot. (grins vacantly)  
**Draco :** ow, legs hurt. Damn cramp coming back. No missionary position for a while, then. (winces)  
**Harry :** (grins) hee hee.  
**Seamus :** Pwoar! Drools!  
**Prof Sinistra :** Irish midget definitely hitting on me. Heh heh, what they say about short men and sex drive! These Wonderbra really works!  
**Draco :** must get Harry to change that lube. That one dries my skin. Ouch, dick hurts. Sigh, looks like I'll be bottom again this week...  
**Terry Boot :** (winks at Blaise)  
**Blaise :** (gapes) ! (giggles)  
**Harry :** wonder if Draco's game to try this new position ... need to find a doorway with a lintel though.  
**Dean :** stop nicking my candy, you oaf! (kicks Crabbe)

_Scruffles_

**Ron :** something's fishy going on with these two (eyeing his best friend and mortal enemy)  
**Harry :** (grins vacantly) yeah, if he can hang on the lintel and wrap his legs round me, I think I can get it in. Must owl him ... see if he's game.  
**Draco :** (scratches privates) Ow, must remind Harry not to suck too hard. Feels tender already.  
**Terry Boot :** (ogles Blaise) yeah Baby!  
**Blaise :** (blushes) oh, behave!  
**Ron :** that's it. I'm going to nick his Invisibility Cloak and follow him tonight.  
**Harry :** (waggles tip of tongue at Draco) just you wait! Class will be over in a tick. I'll maul you stupid.  
**Draco :** (smirks) come and get it, lover.

_Bell rings signaling end of class. Students rushes to the exit. Except Seamus._

**Draco :** (shoves roughly against Harry. Sneers aloud) watch it, you four-eyed git.  
**Harry :** you have a problem, Malfoy? (stares down his nose)  
**Draco :** _you_ are the problem, you moron. Befouling this school with your presence!  
**Harry :** (glares and swaggers towards Draco until they are nose-to-nose) what say we step out and settle it, _mano-a-mano?_  
**Hermi :** NO FIGHTING , HARRY!  
**Harry & Draco :** shut up, already!  
**Draco :** no problem, Potter.  
**Harry :** (small wink) scared, Malfoy?  
**Draco :** (suppressing a grin) you wish, Potter.  
**Harry :** let's go then.

**END**


End file.
